So I'll start at the beginning. I drank the Smooth Move tea last night before bed. I had read that the tea was bitter but I bought a chocolate variety that was fairly pleasant. Actually I liked it.
Off to bed I went. I read about stomach cramps, but I didn't have any.
This morning was a different story however .... salt water as a beverage is so gross! I didn't or couldn't make it through the whole quart. I think I drank about 21 oz. For those of you who actually know me, you'd know that 21 oz. of anything is pretty good for me. I don't drink enough of anything.
It's crazy, you drink, 5 minutes later is comes shooting out your ass. My brother would call it shissing. Shissing is when your ass is pissing. This went on for as long as it took me to drink all the salt water I could possibly drink before I thought I'd puke. The rest of the day was fine except for the times when I thought I may eat my own arm.
I just wanted something to chew on, gum perhaps? No gum allowed. I really wanted some gum! I also really wanted ice cream. That is why I am doing this cleanse, because my relationship with sugar is unbalanced to say the least. My love affair with sugar started in elementary school when my mean old mom would try to keep us apart. It progressed just like most love affairs, hiding, sneaking away to be alone, lying about being together and of course that ever present feeling of "when can I see you again?" (did you sing that line like you were supposed to?) I am not ready to say we're breaking up, I am saying that I am ready for a change in our relationship.
It is time to go start the water for my tea. Until tomorrow .....
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